Ask Ella

While I love all the comments that people post on my blog (keep ‘em comin’!), most of my favorite responses are private emails that people send me.

Sometimes it’s just a nice word of praise that includes more private details of a person’s life that they don’t want to share with the 10 or so people that read this thing.

Sometimes it’s dudes (and chicks) asking for naked pictures of me. (Always sent, of course…haha. I kid.)

Sometimes it’s Gawker folks commenting offline about the little nuances of this underground commenting society we are all oddly addicted to.

Sometimes it’s men asking me out on dates. (Um, actually that worked for two men. One that didn’t pan out and, well, one man who you will all likely be hearing about soon.)

But quite often, people actually ask for my ADVICE, which is just hysterically stupid to me. After all, most of my posts are written with a great deal of HINDSIGHT and the decisions I actually made in the past are pretty fucking dumb.

At first I thought - I can’t actually answer these people - I’m pretty wrong about things most of the time. But then it occurred to me that I’ve always been able to tell OTHERS what to do - I just rarely take any of my own advice. Plus, I’ve been to therapy. I know a lot of really fucked up people. I took Psych 101, at Boston U! And, well, I just think I know everything.

And so, I am posting an open invitation for anyone to email me with a problem or question. It can be on just about anything - beauty (I do write about almost every beauty product known to man at my job), sex toys (I’ve sampled a ton), contemporary american history (it was my second major in college), relationships (as I think I may have finally cracked the code after years of horror shows), the New York Yankees (seriously, seriously) or sex in general (come on, I mean you have read this blog, right?)

My only request is that you don’t ask me anything about money (I’m not Suze Orman - although I have loved the p*ssy in my day), religion (unless you buy me weed and can handle a 12-page response), politics (because we should all just agree to disagree) or medical issues (because, honestly, most are just plain mother fuckin’ nasty).

I will answer every email I receive and select a few (from time to time) to post on here. All email addresses/names/etc. will remain anonymous.

So come on bitches…ask Ella. She’s trying to become the real “white Oprah.”

Email: ellagood@gmail.com