Sex and the Sniglets

Although I was too young to understand most of the Reagan/Gorbachev jokes, I still loved watching Not Necessarily the News as a child. For those of you who have never seen it, it was one part Daily Show, one part cracka-ass-cracka Dave Chapelle. One of the most famous bits on the show was a series of segments called Sniglets, in which Rich Hall would describe “any word that doesn’t appear in the dictionary, but should.” Here are some of my favorite examples (um, yes, I have two Sniglets books - it’s anyone’s guess how I get laid):

Napjerk - the sudden convulsion of the body just as one is about to doze off
Aeroma - the odor emanating from an exercise room after an aerobics workout
Spood - the flat wooden “spoon” that accompanies ice cream cups

After smoking a bowl not too long ago, I picked up these books and entertained myself for about 12 hours. And that got me thinking. Here now are some Sniglets of the adult variety. Please feel free to contribute your own suggestions.

Condamn - the small piece of the condom wrapper that your significant other notices on your bedroom floor (ps - you guys don’t use condoms)
The Morning After Pill - the girl who is a slut in bed at night but who refuses to be touched in the morning
Simax - the silent moment right before one has an orgasm
Awkwalk - the act of leaving a couple’s apartment after a threesome
Gayzation - the moment you realize someone you want to fuck is gay
Titslits - the annoying marks you find on your breasts after you take your bra off
Sexcuse - the last shot of the night that justifies the sex you really don’t really want to have
Forgottmen - the men women don’t factor in when their significant other asks them how many men they have slept with