The great American designer of our times is not Michael Kors or Donna Karan or even Ralph Lauren. It is this woman:
If you don’t know what the quack I am talking about, I suggest you begin watching qvc (the exclusive seller of The Quacker Factory) immediately. There is a movement of women – primarily in the Midwest and south – who are walking around in shit like this:
And, I kid you not, when they see one another (because, I mean, come the fuck on, there is no mistaking these types of patterns) they, literally, “QUACK.”
These women love HOLIDAYS:
They love really weird combos like PICNICS AND FROGS:
They love GOD:
It should come as NO surprise that Quacker Factory pieces come in ridiculously large sizes. 2X, 3X, 4X…You can bet that women who get forklifted out of their homes are wearing vests like this:
My questions to Quackers are pretty basic:
Why?
Why are you a walking Hallmark card?
Is this a conscious decision to be celibate? (because no man can be turned on by this:
I hope you agree with me, America, I think it’s time we go duck huntin’. Cause “styles” like this just can’t live on:
8 comments:
I just threw up a little.
Ha! I don't think I've seen this post before. I have this sickness where if I'm channel surfing and Quacker Factory happens to be on, I have to watch a little, because I CANNOT BELIEVE THESE WOMEN ARE SO LAME. It's like watching a car wreck...you can't take your eyes off it.
Here's the thing, I totally agree with you. But for some strange reason I am drawn to these sweaters. I have always wanted one. It started as a way to irritate my best friend but it has now become a serious desire.
I need help...
Maybe I am just not angry or frustrated by what people wear, but if these sweaters or shirts make the women who buy them happy...then what is the problem? The women wearing them aren't trying to be sexy or tattooing their bodies or wearing skin tight polyester to leave nothing to the imagination...they like sweet sweaters. What's the problem? And, why is everyone so negative about EVERY ONE AND EVERY THING other people wear or do? When did putting down anyone different from ourselves become the accepted norm?
I tell you, if a nice chubby lady came up and said hello wearing a Valentine's sweater and a dirty, scrungy person with bad breath came up and said hello...I'd take the lady with the smile and happy sweater any day.
Try to be less opinionated and open your hearts and minds. Geez.
i'm not attacking the people who wear the clothes. i'm attacking the clothes.
notice that you inserted "chubby woman" when describing the woman who wears these clothes. after that, you juxtaposed it with someone with "bad breath."
that's way more disturbing to me than what i was saying.
let it also be known that i am a bit chubby; and was never attacking someone for being a larger size - i was merely attacking those who choose to dress like children in a third grade pageant.
there are lots of women who see these fantastic and fun sweaters as wearing their happiness on their sleeves. Go ahead and wear your overpriced, boring, black clothes, EllaGood, because you're sad, pathetic and missing out on perhaps one of the greatest fashion lines ever to exist in the history of mankind. So go quack off.
ok, now i know this is bullshit.
only danny would know how much i wear black.
xoxo
Hi,
I found this blog post on the Quacker Factory community page. is this for reals?
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